Help! My daughter refuses to use toothpaste
Just because a child doesn’t like one type of toothpaste doesn’t mean she’ll refuse them all. Many kids hate the minty taste of traditional adult toothpastes — but might love a berry or bubblegum flavor.
By five or six, kids should be able to spit out the foam rather than swallow it. If your daughter hasn’t mastered this skill yet, teaching her how to do so can make brushing more pleasant for both of you.
If your daughter still refuses to use toothpaste, have her brush with a wet toothbrush and no paste, and then follow up with a fluoride rinse. Many studies prove that topical fluoride helps prevent cavities, so this step is critical if she’s not using toothpaste that contains fluoride.
Even though your daughter probably still has mostly baby teeth, keeping them healthy is essential. If she loses them too early because of excessive decay, her permanent teeth can drift, which increases the odds that she’ll need orthodontia. Instilling good oral hygiene habits early will benefit her for the rest of her life.
CROUP or Why Does My Child Have a “Barky Cough”?
Croup, or laryngotracheobronchitis, is caused by many viral infections and falls into the category of upper respiratory infection along with the common cold. Croup tends to occur in the autumn and early winter months. In croup, the major areas affected are the ones referred to in the long name of this illness (above); the larynx, trachea and bronchi, which are all structures that convey air from the mouth and nose down toward the lungs. As with all colds or upper respiratory infections there is inflammation of the mucosa (most superficial covering) of the inside of the nose, mouth, throat and upper respiratory tract, leading to mucous production and irritation of those sites.
In croup, the area of the upper respiratory tract most prominently affected is the larynx, or the voice box area located very close to the firm lump in the front of your neck, the “adam’s apple”. When vocal cords are irritated and swollen, adults merely get hoarse or raspy talking and a “normal” sounding cough. Children have a much narrower windpipe and therefore with even the slightest swelling of their vocal cords, there is less room for air to get by and they also get hoarseness along with a cough and raspy breathing. There is also a characteristic barky (yes sounds like a animal barking) kind of cough and occasional difficulty breathing. All symptoms tend to be worse at night, a time when all illnesses seem to worsen.
For the most part this illness remains mild and the only treatment needed is a cool mist humidifier, fluid intake, elevated head at night and reassurance for the child and parents. Rarely a child may progress to real difficulty breathing, with a characteristic whooping noise when taking a breath in versus a wheezing sound when breathing out found more commonly in those with asthma. So if your child exhibits difficulty breathing along with the above symptoms, call your doctor for further instructions.
Once a child has had croup, parents seldom forget what the barky cough sounds like and can make the diagnosis themselves. Usually, as with other upper respiratory viral infections there is a mild amount of fever and the child is not real sick. If there is sudden high fever with the onset of “croup” and your child is drooling, cannot swallow or speak, and is very anxious, you must call your doctor immediately or call 911. This symptom complex describes a rare but life threatening illness called epiglotitis which can be very dangerous. I stress that this is a rare illness which used to be far more common before we were able to vaccinate against the bacteria which causes this illness.
What Parenting Style Works Best For You…and Your Child?
For decades, pop psych has embraced the premise that there are three basic 
parenting styles: authoritarian (“Follow my rules because I say so!”), permissive (“OK, you can stay up to 11 p.m., but you’re going to be really tired tomorrow!”), and last but not least, authoritative (“I know other kids are doing it, but we think it’s too dangerous, so no, you can’t.”). It’s that approach — a combination of no-nonsense limit-setting with understanding and concern — which experts say is ideal. (A fourth parenting style, uninvolved, is for parents who check out entirely.)
“Authoritative parents certainly make demands, but they also take time to listen to their kids, empathize with how they might feel and explain why they think their decisions are best for them in the long run,” says Michele Borba, Ed.D., author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions. This kind of parenting style produces the most emotionally healthy children, she adds.
Not sure where you fit in? Check out these scenarios:
Scenario No. 1
You find out your child, who’s not allowed on Facebook and is under the age-13 limit anyway, has been checking it out at her friend’s house.
- Authoritarian “You not only broke my rules, you broke Facebook’s rule. I am taking away your computer privileges for two weeks, and you won’t be allowed at Sara’s house until I speak with her mother.”
- Permissive “I’m really disappointed you went behind my back. But I guess you must be very curious about this stuff so why don’t we open an account together?”
- Authoritative “I’m not happy that you broke the rules. Were you tempted because it seems like everyone else is Facebooking? Let me explain again why I don’t think it’s appropriate or safe for you right now. And if you do break the rules again, you will lose your computer privileges.”
Scenario No. 2
Your 8-year-old wants you to move his bedtime from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m.
- Authoritarian “Sorry, but you need eight hours of shut-eye. Period. Now let’s go read a story before bed.”
- Permissive “Just because your friend Joey is allowed to go to bed at 9 doesn’t mean you should. I tell you what, though: Let’s compromise and make it 8:30. Does that work for you?”
- Authoritative “I know it must drive you nuts that Joey gets to go to bed at 9, but you need your sleep to have enough energy and focus for school. What is it that you want to do with the extra time you’re awake?
Scenario No. 3
You ask your 11-year-old to empty the dishwasher. An hour later, he’s still playing his guitar … and the dishwasher is still full.
- Authoritarian “This is the third time this week you’ve ignored my requests! You can forget allowance for this week, and we’ll have to see what happens next week.”
- Permissive “Hey, didn’t you hear me? I asked you three times to empty the dishwasher. I took care of it, but can you please take the garbage out after dinner?”
- Authoritative “I know how much you love guitar. And I’m thrilled to see you’re practicing. But I’m going nuts downstairs getting dinner on the table so we can all eat before midnight. To do that, I need your help. That means if I ask you to empty the dishwasher, you need to do it.”
Authoritarian parents aren’t meanies, and permissive parents aren’t pushovers. But the middle ground, experts agree, works best for kids.
“Children raised by authoritative parents grow up feeling that they are heard, that they are worthy of having rules explained to them,” says Dr. Laura Markham, a clinical psychologist and editor of the Web site Aha Parenting. “They understand and ultimately appreciate their parents’ limits and demands because they believe their parents are on their side.”
New Font Helps Kids with Dyslexia Read More Accurately
Christian Boer, a graphic designer from the Netherlands, put his artistic talent to work to solve his own struggles with dyslexia. He designed a new font that gives the brain extra help recognizing letters, words and punctuation. The changes to the letters are subtle but may make all the difference to a child or adult with the condition. The font was his Masters thesis and now Dyslexie is available for purchase on his website at http://www.studiostudio.nl/project-dyslexie/ and payment is accepted via Paypal in euros. There are business and personal versions as well as a school version for kids.
Here is a video demonstration of the dyslexie font:
Children, Follow My (Healthy Eating) Cues
Feeding behaviors are solidified early in life. In general, children are wonderful examples of listening to their hunger and satiety cues. Both of my children are great examples. My son is a really big eater in the morning and into lunch time and then has a tendency to pick the rest of the day. While other days, he eats very little. My daughter, on the other hand, eats a small amount at breakfast and then slowly picks up throughout the day. Some days, she seems to eat the amount a grown woman would eat! But I trust she is accurately listening to her own body as she remains active and her weight is following a healthy growth curve.
Unfortunately, many parents confuse children when they tell them to eat because it is meal time. Parents think, “Surely they should be hungry because they haven’t eaten in several hours.” And not only do some parents make children eat, some make them clean their plates. I recently wrote a letter to a well-known, elite school here in Dallas when the mother of one of my pediatric patients (who happens to be a physician) told me they still practice the clean plate club at their school. Really?! I thought everyone has figured out by now that this is not a good thing to do if we want to encourage healthy eating. The clean plate club trains the body to “untrust” its physiological signals to eat or not to eat. This approach may have started back in the Depression when food was scarce, but I see many adult patients that are still trying to unlearn what they were taught by their parents. “Do not get up from this table until your plate is clean.” Or, “If you want that dessert, you better eat everything on that plate.” Dietitians cringe at the thought, although I truly believe parents are very well-intentioned.
One of the best food behavior gifts we can give our children is the gift of trusting in their own hunger and fullness cues. I credit my own mother for allowing me and my siblings to make our own decisions to eat or not, and I firmly believe this has been one of the foundations to my healthy relationship with food. We ate as a family at the table without distractions (this is key), which helped us in listening to our individual cues. Because of mom, I can have my favorite food under my nose and if I am not hungry, I have no desire to eat it.
Hunger Scale by Paula Ryan, MS, of Healthiest Regards Blog
Paula Ryan, MS, author of the Healthiest Regards Blog, posted a great hunger and satiety scale that I wanted to share with readers. It’s one of the best I have seen because it also lists the consequences of waiting too long eat, or not stopping when the body says it has had enough. If you find yourself eating in the absence of hunger or waiting way too long to eat, consider printing this scale off and going back to the basics. Many people eat for reasons other than hunger – like when they are stressed, mad or sad. Deal with those issues directly instead of turning to food. It may be easier said than done for some, but this can be a start to a healthier YOU in 2012. And a healthier you means a healthier family because the children are watching – and doing what you do.
