How to Talk to Your Kids About…Rejection

Last updated on March 3rd, 2018 at 10:20 am

Rejection is part of life. And although it is not fun, it is something that we all have to deal with.

How do you talk to your kids

As parents, it is key for us to help our children understand rejection, long before it hits them, so that the situations don’t set them back, discourage them, or keep them from trying again.

When your child is faced with rejection, don’t overreact. We need to sympathize with them, listen to them, and let them know they are understood. Then we can work to develop a plan to handle the situation.

After rejection, children are already feeling sad, hurt and vulnerable. They need us to be supportive and loving. It is not the time to lecture, say “I told you so”, or try to prove a point. This will only make our children feel rejected again.

Conversations about rejection need to focus on a few key points…

  • Help children understand what rejection is. Explain that it is a part of life.
  • Talk to them about the fact that not everyone will want to be their friend, or include them. That is okay and is not a reflection on them.
  • Talk to them about not relying on others to define their worth.
  • Talk to your child about choosing friends who are kind and accepting.

It is also important for us as parents, to model good behavior when it comes to rejection. Our children watch everything we do.

Rejection

Lastly, talk about past situations where your child (or when you) have worked through rejection. Talk about the strategies they used and help them apply “what worked” to new situations.

There is no way around it, rejection will happen. Preparing our children ahead of time will give them the courage to work through it and move on.

About the Author

Heather Ann Johnson is a homemaker, wife and mother. She and her husband have 4 children. She is an Adjunct Faculty member at Brigham Young University where she teaches students the principles behind successful families. Her blog, Family Volley, answers reader’s questions about families, marital relationships, and raising children. A firm believer that families should play together, Family Volley features a new activity or game for families every Friday. Heather is a former member of the PedSafe Expert team

Comments

One Response to “How to Talk to Your Kids About…Rejection”

  1. Very valuable tips. My kids are very young so I’m likely just about to have to start dealing with this as they go through school and I’m sure these will help me out because rejection is inevitable and that will be one tough lesson for my boys to learn.

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